They Pelted Us With Rocks And Garbage!

By , May 20, 2015 9:01 pm

Letterman_Avengers

Tonight CBS airs David Letterman’s final show after 33 years on late night TV. I swiped a lot from David Letterman over the years, so I’m obviously sad to see him go. However, there are a few silver linings in this cloud, as you’ll see when you take a look at…

Tgreen’s Top Ten Good Things About David Letterman’s Retirement:

10. No more grown-ups on late night TV, so Jimmy Fallon will no longer look like a 12-year-old in comparison

9. Can finally stop trying to teach your dog a Stupid Pet Trick to get yourself on TV

8. Only cranky old guy you have to deal with regularly now is your dad

7. One less place for Jay Leno to ever appear on my TV again

6. Now you can really dig in to that last half hour of Conan without feeling guilty about it

5. The chance that Drew Barrymore might hop on your desk and flash you just increased by .00000000001%

4. No more getting creeped out by Paul Shafer’s bald head

3. Can stop worrying that someone on TV might say something to hurt Oprah’s feelings

2. CBS’s audience demographic just dropped all the way from 75 to 74.5

1. In a few weeks, no one will even remember where I swiped this Top Ten idea from

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